Not In a Perfect Place, But In a Better Place
Day 1: Life After Completing Therapy
Scroll to the bottom of this post for a free one-page worksheet download
Exactly a year ago, I began my journey into therapy for the second time as an adult. My first go-around wasn’t the ideal experience and left me wondering if maybe therapy just wasn’t right for me. Then life happened and things got messy. I was faced with a challenging dilemma and unable to cope on my own. Enough time had passed since my last experience, so my mind was a bit more open to trying therapy again.
This time during my search, I knew well enough that the alignment of values and expectations between myself and a therapist must equitable. My search began and I stumbled upon a wonderful practice that embodied so much of what I value in myself and life itself. As my first appointment was approaching, I felt so many different emotions. I felt confused as to what I would experience, fear of having to talk about things that caused me so much pain and insecurity about being judged. Of course these were all normal emotions to experience before going into therapy as a 30-something year old who is stubbornly independent and has an abnormal fear of relying on others (Yes, me, we’re talking about me).
Fast forward a few months and I was already feeling like a completely different person. Now, let’s not assume life stressors melted away. I was still in the midst of some pretty heavy life experiences, but I felt more equipped to manage and navigate those moments. I experienced some awakenings of how I was not consistently showing up for myself and for others. I had someone who was able to share new perspectives in a safe way. I was becoming so excited for this journey of growth that I could not wait for 7pm to roll around every Tuesday. Even though I was on this journey of growth, and looking back it feels like this consistent upward climb, in each moment I felt that familiar invisible pull and tug of emotions . Each session carried a high and low, but the consistent factor was that at the end I had experienced clarity and release.
The year of therapy was unlike anything that I had expected in the best way possible. As my year mark was approaching, my therapist was completely transparent that I was beginning to enter a very healthy and positive place in my life, so we began stretching apart our sessions. Even though we did not meet as frequently, I knew that I could see myself continuing therapy with her for another year. But a few months later she shared some news that would ultimately change this plan of mine. She shared some heartbreaking news that she would be leaving the practice and our sessions together would be coming to an end. I was faced with the decision to continue therapy with someone new, or take a leap and navigate life without therapy for a little bit.
I’m a firm believer in divine timing and I know to have faith when plans change. While I was extremely emotional about this new chapter, I decided to trust myself with these new skills and go out on my own for a bit. My therapist was someone who I allowed myself to be completely open and vulnerable with, so saying goodbye felt like the hardest thing to do. During our last session we talked so much about progress and gratitude, and I will forever be grateful for our time spent together. This has inspired me to share with others the incredible, yet simple tools that she had shared with me.
To hold myself accountable, I try to go through this daily exercise of questions that she would ask me to make space for awareness and mindfulness throughout some stressful moments. These questions made me feel safe in whatever emotion I was feeling, while allowing for me to have mental clarity on finding my way through. I put together this digital download for anyone to use, in the hopes that it might help shift your awareness over time.
Feel free to save the image below and infuse it into your daily routine. Whether that be a morning or night routine, allow yourself to take up space. You deserve it.
Love & Light,
Valerie
